Monday, August 06, 2007
06 : Move Along
"Haru, you okay?"
I almost choked on by bread. Damn, I've been daydreaming.
Michiru looked at me curiously.
"I'm fine, I'm fine," I said, grabbing my chocolate milk and drank it to bring the stuck piece of bread down my throat.
Michiru smiled. I smiled feebly back.
"Hey, hey, you know Minami Keisuke?"
"Who?"
"Minami Keisuke!! KM!!"
"...ah...the guitarist from Stories and Lies...?" I forced my brain to recall every bit of words I read from the magazine, yet trying to appear cool, calm and collected.
"Yeah, him!!" Michiru beamed at me, then continued, "Chiharu and Maya said they saw him around here yesterday!!"
"Is that really him?"
"Of course, who else would have that flawless, handsome face..."
Michiru somehow got transported to Dreamsville for a second or two.
Then I remembered Jun.
"Where exactly did they saw him?" I tried to sound uninterested.
"At the junction to the row of shops, near the cafe you work in -- didn't you see him?"
"Can't say."
"He has dark blond hair, around 180 cm...ah, Maya said he wore blue shirt yesterday..."
Michiru paused, then her eyes grew large.
"She said she saw him go into a cafe!!"
She almost screamed excitedly even though I just sat there looking at her. I waited until she calmed down, then said, "Oh, yeah, he did. Only he wasn't KM."
Michiru might as well had heart attack, seeing her face all blank, her previous excitement died instantly.
I finished my drink and continued, "There are people in this world who look exactly like me and you, and KM, and everybody else. So why the disappointment?"
Michiru frowned and muttered, "Idiot."
When she stowed away her lunch box, she asked me quietly, "How can you be sure?"
"Hm?"
"How can you know he's not the real KM?"
"He introduced himself to me, asking if there's a job he can do in the cafe. Also he was looking for a place to stay."
Michiru didn't say anything, but she didn't look too sure.
"He introduced himself to me, alright? His name's Jun."
She sighed. "Well...if you say that..."
We walked home together after school. She wants to see Jun herself, so I brought her to the cafe. Taku will like this little event, he had a crush on her a while back. Apparently she said she's not ready for a relationship yet when Taku asked her out one day, and for a few days Taku got all emotional and sulky. I had to slap him around twenty times to wake him up. He got out of his misery slowly, but at times he still asked me about Michiru.
All I could do is say, "She's fine, but she said she doesn't want to see anyone now."
Taku will be silent for a few minutes, then regain his composure again.
As we reached the front glass doors, I saw a blond guy waving at me from inside. Peering through the glass I realized it's Jun bringing out forks and spoons onto the table. I waved back half-heartedly. Michiru, on the other hand, tried to suppress a giggle.
"You're starting today?" I asked Jun when we got in.
"Yep, I got in this morning," Jun replied cheerily.
Michiru tugged at the back of my shirt.
"Oh, right. Here's my friend Michiru."
"Nice to meet you. I'm Jun," he held out his hand.
Michiru shook it a bit enthusiastically.
"She said you look mighty like a celebrity."
"Haru!!" Her face grew a bit pink. "You're embarrassing me!!"
"It's true right?"
"Yeah, but..." her words trailed off into the silence.
Jun smiled, looking interested. Then he said, "Really? Which celebrity?"
I looked at Michiru. She looked up shyly and mouthed "KM".
"Sorry?" Jun seems to be enjoying this little amusement.
"Minami Keisuke," she said a bit louder. She brought her face down again.
"Interesting...many have said the same thing, actually. Even since this morning, a few customers asked for my autograph!" Jun laughed airily.
Michiru didn't say anything, but she looked into Jun's face quite intently.
"But you really look like him, you know," she indicated his earrings, "you even have the same earrings. Is he like your idol or something?"
"Yeah. I like his mad guitar skills the first time I saw his video, while he was still in Stories and Lies." Jun might've been reliving the memory inside his mind, for he was smiling widely.
Michiru smiled. I just stood there listening to them both.
"Well then, Jun, nice meeting you. I've to go now, my mom's probably wondering where I've been to," she said finally, shaking Jun's hand again.
Me and Jun walked her out and waved at her as she crossed the street.
When she was out of sight, I thought of going home myself but Jun held me back.
"What if I really am KM?"
I stared at him.
"Would you believe me?"
All I could think was : is he screwing with me?
Jun looked at me as if interested, then pat me on the shoulder. "Ha, you should see your face just now -- it's like I've hit you round the head."
"Oh haha, very funny."
Jun laughed. "So you're starting your shift now?"
"Nah, later in the evening. I've got homeworks to do."
"So see you later then."
"Mm. Yeah."
+++ 06 : Move Along (by The All-American Rejects)Nadia Nor at 02:33
Tuesday, June 26, 2007
05 : Without A Cause
A few steps from the cafe, someone caught up with me from behind.
What do you know, it's that guy who applied for the job.
"Can I help you...?" I asked him.
"Actually, yeah, that's the reason I chased you here." He smiled.
"So...?" I looked up at him. That familiar feeling is still there, really.
"I just wanna ask, are there any apartments near here that I can rent...," he paused, and probably seeing my puzzled face, he continued quickly, "Ah, I'm new here, I'm staying at a relative's house now. I'd really like to have my own residence here, you know, not wanting to trouble my relative much...?"
I nodded a bit, awkward being asked such a thing.
He smiled some more.
"I think there's one near here...not sure exactly where, only heard it from my friend though. But you can try asking the manager back there, she knows this place better than I do."
He nodded a few times and reached inside his pocket, from which he got out his cellphone.
"Thanks...uh...?" He cocked his head sideways, his eyes narrowed towards me.
"...yeah?" I blinked a few times, unsure of what he wanted further from me.
"Haven't introduced myself yet, sorry. I'm Jun." He held out his right hand.
"Haru." I held out mine and gave a brief shake.
"Thanks, Haru." He took a glance at his cellphone screen. "Ah, I should be going now, my friend's waiting for me. See you tomorrow!"
I just waved a bit as he ran off in the opposite direction to his so-called 'friend' who was waiting beside the cafe. I saw them going off in a black Nissan before turning around to head off in my own route again.
I thought about the conversation all the way home.
Talking with him face-to-face really makes his face seems familiar.
I know I've seen it somewhere before.
...why am I so worked up with this, anyway?
I scratched my head roughly in front of my front door and let out a breath of frustration. I got out the housekeys and switched on the lights inside. After closing the door, I let myself fall heavily on the sofa in front of the TV.
There were a few random magazines on the coffee table.
Must be Hikaru's.
I was about to get up from the comfortable sofa when my eyes caught something on one of the magazines. I quickly picked it up.
The face that was splashed across the cover was the one face I thought of since a few hours earlier. The face I thought looked really familiar. The face that annoyed me to a certain extent.
The face of Jun.
"It can't be...," I said to myself. I looked for his name, but it was nowhere to be found. Nothing even close to 'Jun', instead I read a lot of 'K.M's.
K.M I know is a celebrity, but Jun? No, doesn't ring a bell.
So he might really be just a familiar face.
No wonder I've seen him somewhere before.
Snickering at myself, I got up from the table and decided to take a shower.
I've been thinking hard without any reasons at all.
I hoped the shower'll help me wash away these unnecessary worries.
Sheesh.
+++ 05 : Without A Cause (by Pop Shuvit)Nadia Nor at 01:13
Wednesday, June 20, 2007
04 : Seize the Day
The group which made a dinner appointment here in our cafe showed up rather late than promised, but they're still customers who have the right to ask for our service.
From what I could see, they're all from the same workplace, most probably a work-dinner-meeting-thing. Me and Taku had to stand their demands for three hours straight.
I know I shouldn't complain.
Who am I to do so?
I'm just a worker here, already bound by this work of submitting to others' orders.
If there's anyone or anything to blame, it'll be my own incompetence.
There's also something in particular that somehow got on my nerves. The pair of bodyguard-charge I noticed since the rain started, they're still there, even after the group had left. Well, the charge was there all the time, the bodyguard kept going out at times.
I wonder who the hell they are?
And why am I so ticked off?
They're probably waiting (really) patiently for someone that had yet to show up.
While I'm working myself off all day, they're just sitting there waiting, doing nothing.
This sounds childish, I know. Complaining about useless stuff that isn't even my problem. I don't have anything to do with them at all.
They must've only had today as their day off. Who knows what they do on other days. They might have harder works to do than me, a mere teenager, going to a school on weekdays, and doing part-time jobs on free times and weekends. Who knows, right?
There are people more unfortunate than me out there, somewhere.
"Excuse me...please?"
I immediately looked around. Who dared interrupt my rambling while arranging these chairs and tables?
"...excuse me?"
The charge of the pair, the younger-looking guy, waved towards me. I narrowed my eyes and looked around. I'm not really into social interaction at this time, for your information. I was hoping for another worker to be around me, but luck never had been on my side for many times. I sighed and went to the guy.
Who seemed familiar in a closer range. I thought for a while as he said something, until he asked me, "Are you listening?"
"--I'm sorry, I don't quite get what you wanted...you want...?"
He snickered. "I don't want anything. I just asked if I can work here, as a part-timer, maybe."
I must've blinked a lot of times to make this person say, "I don't think you're believing me. Well, I'm not really suited to having jobs, in fact this is the first time I'm asking for one...so should I ask someone else...?"
I mentally shook my head, then said, "We're not hiring anyone at the moment, actually. But we could need more help...I'll ask the manager here for you. Or would you like to ask her yourself? You know, to ask stuff personally."
His face almost literally brighten up, and answered, "Can I ask her myself? Please?"
"Sure...I'll call her in a bit." I looked over at the counter. "You stay here, alright."
I asked Taku if what the guy asked for is possible, and he looked for his mother in the back office. A minute later the manager stepped out of the counter and looked around. I showed her to the guy, and left them at their table.
"I didn't think many people would like to work here...as a part-timer even," Taku said to me when I reached the counter after the chairs and tables were arranged neatly. I just nodded.
"Ah well, this little cafe of ours might've reached some kind of popularity status among the people around here. Finally. We might get a raise, Haru!" Taku said happily, and literally beamed at me.
I can only shrug and looked sideways at the manager and the guy.
Really, that guy looked familiar. I'm sure I've seen him before. Seriously sure.
"Hey, Taku. That guy, you think he seems familiar?"
Taku turned to look over. He stared for a few seconds.
"Oi, if you want to stare, do it discreetly...you're attracting his attention, idiot."
"Sorry." Taku lowered his gaze, but he could still take in the guy's facial details.
"...so...? Enough staring yet?"
"Hm. Yeah, he does, somehow. But don't remember from where. Same school?"
"I don't think so...my guess is he's older than the both of us...and we've never been to the same school. Except for middle school."
Taku shrugged. "Yeah, you're right."
I kept silent for a bit.
"Why're you so interested in asking 'bout this guy?"
"Dunno. Maybe the familiarity is bugging me. Ah well." I stretched, and walked through the door to the back office to sign out for the day.
When I came out again, I could see the guy was smiling widely and saying thank you to the manager a few times. He must've got the job he wants. Well, congratulations to him.
I wish I could be congratulated upon, even for a small thing.
To anyone out there, get what you want no matter how.
Have the courage to seize your own opportunities.
I went up to Taku's room, got all my stuff, and went back down again to say goodbye to them all. Finally I can go back to the comfort of my own home.
+++ 04 : Seize the Day (by Avenged Sevenfold)Nadia Nor at 23:32
Monday, May 14, 2007
03 : Round and Round
I didn't get to sleep at all like I planned to.
I glanced out of the window. The rain didn't give any signs of stopping any time soon, but it was slowly subsiding little by little. Probably by the time I finish my work the rain will have stopped.
I sat up, stretched, and lie down again.
But still, I can't get myself to sleep.
Frustrated a bit, I got up and looked over Taku's magazine collection. I picked a few randomly, then sat down leaning against the wall just underneath the window.
Then a barely audible sound resonated from underneath my school bag.
I slowly dragged myself towards it, all the while mumbling under my breath.
I picked out my cell phone, and read the name flashing on the outside screen.
Hikaru. My brother.
I sighed a bit before flipping the phone open to answer the call.
"Yeah, Haru here."
A few coughs could be heard over the line. I patiently waited.
"...let me guess why you're calling."
"The usual, of course. I'm staying over at the office tonight. So...yeah. That's it."
This conversation seems like it occurs too many times to even care about.
"Sure. You finish your work."
"You too. Later."
I flipped the phone close. So then, me alone in the house tonight.
Not that it matters, since this happens quite frequently, especially lately. Working as an interior designer for a small company that's competing with every other companies in this day and age.
Of course you have to work hard. Harder than your rivals.
In fact, Hikaru's company is doing pretty well nowadays. I envy him a lot, since he knows what he wants and how to get it.
Me?
I'm still wondering.
I don't know what I want to do, what my strengths and weaknesses are.
Sometimes I even wonder who I am.
I glanced at the wall clock of Taku's room. It's still early for me to go down for work, but it's dead boring to sit here all alone doing nothing. Plus I didn't want to think much.
I decided I'd go help them out.
So I went downstairs immediately.
As I reached the main floor, I looked around briefly around the cafe.
I don't know why, but the previous bodyguard-charge pair I saw earlier was the first people I got my eyes on. I wondered why they returned back here.
Shrugging, I went to get my apron from the room at the back of the cafe.
Here goes another day, working in the cafe.
Like always.
Life goes round and round, like that.
+++ 03 : Round and Round (by L'Arc~en~Ciel)Nadia Nor at 01:57
Sunday, May 13, 2007
02 : It's Gonna Rain
I stepped out of the school grounds, along with the other students. I don't have many close friends who will walk together with me like the others around me, but I have no problem being alone all the way to my home. It saves me the hassle to think of what to talk about, what's the newest gossip heard, when will I have a girlfriend, so on, so on.
I prefer being an observer, a person who just sees the world around him and explain how or why things happen as they do. Or what will people do next. What they may be possibly thinking.
Actually I will walk together with Michiru and a few of her friends after school, but even without her having class duties, we will part ways halfway through my walk home. So I don't feel much different with or without her.
That sounded kind of cruel, I know. I don't need people to think for me, thank you.
I reached the crossroad in front of the row of shops some three blocks away from the school. That's when I heard the rumble of a thunder in the skies.
Why didn't I notice the sky was turning steadily grey with every step I took?
Feeling the first few drops of a light drizzle, I hurried across the road to a cafe in one of the shops. The thunder continued to rage inside the almost perfectly grey clouds.
And I thought the sky was blue just a few hours ago.
As I stepped into the cafe, the rain began to fall, slowly drizzling at first, then became heavier. I rolled my eyes and looked around in the attempt to ease myself from the frustration of not being able to go home, to my little room of temporary heaven.
Ah, I saw Taku at the kitchen window. I walked to him quickly.
Taku turned around just as I reached the counter of which he was behind.
"Ah, Haru! You're coming in early today?"
I work here on night shifts, by the way.
"No, Taku, I definitely am not."
"Nah, I don't think so too. You look kind of pissed off. So why...?"
I pointed to the outside, where heavy rain was pouring onto the street like crazy. My mouth widened in silent shock as I looked on, not expecting it to be this much of a bother.
"Ah...I see...taking cover, huh," Taku said thoughtfully.
Of course I'm only here at this time just to take cover, idiot. But I'm not about to say it out loud now, since I was going to ask for a favor.
"Listen, Taku. Can I crash in upstairs?"
Taku looked at me, face as blank as possible. Which was annoying me.
"Taku...?"
He shrugged. "I don't mind, but let me tell mom first, so she won't freak out."
I just nodded impatiently and waited for him at the counter.
He disappeared up the stairs to the second floor.
As I looked around the cafe, I heard a tinkle of the bell. A customer walked in, clothes soaking wet from the rain outside. Where was this customer when the rain started pouring down? Still walking on the streets? I don't understand what some people think sometimes.
Then another tinkle. In came yet another customer, a weird one. Someone who wouldn't usually be seen inside an average cafe such as this, as he was wearing a complete black suit, with matching black shades, and what apparently seemed like a piece of communicator thing on his ear like those bodyguards usually have on theirs.
This bodyguard-man then handed over the earlier person a towel. Ah, so he was a bodyguard of some sort. But he ought to look over his charge more carefully, since he himself is dry and did not pose any signs of having even touched by the rain, whereas the charge was looking as if he had been running around outside there, splashing water everywhere.
"Haru?"
I cut my eyes from looking at the two, and I found Taku at the bottom staircase, also looking at the out-of-place pair at the entrance.
"Yeah."
"Ah...mom said it's OK, but she wants to remind you that you've to start earlier today. We have a reservation for...something...whatever. Yeah."
"...I'll try. Thanks. Later then."
Taku nodded, and resumed his position behind the counter.
As I stepped up the stairs, I noticed that the bodyguard-charge pair had already went out.
+++ 02 : It's Gonna Rain (sung by Bonnie Pink)Nadia Nor at 01:50
Friday, May 11, 2007
01 : I'm Still Here
I stare out the windows.
Blue sky and white clouds above.
People bustling about the streets a few floors down.
Buildings of various heights and designs level with my eye.
The usual thing I do during class. I know I'm supposed to take notes or concentrate on the teacher (or pretend to), but how long can an average person stand this seemingly everlasting string of sentences? At least I'm not openly sleeping on my desk, like half of the class. Or engage in pointless talks, like those sitting at the back there. Or copying down my classmates' notes and assignments, like that guy at the corner.
"Haru," I heard someone calling from my right.
"Mm," came my reply without taking my stare off the outside scenery.
"Look at me."
I ignored it.
"Haru!"
"What is it?" This is a pain...just let me stare outside.
"I won't give my notes to you, you know?"
"Mm."
"Don't 'mm' me!"
Here we go again.
"Are you listening?"
I shrugged.
"Then take down the notes! Now!"
I just nodded, then continued watching the small group of girls crossing the road. They looked like they're having fun.
A few minutes later, I heard a sigh from my right.
Later, the class ended. After saying thanks to the teacher, the usual shuffling noises of packing up stuff can be heard almost everywhere around school. Added to the scene were the yelling of class duties, scraping of chairs and desks against the floor, laughing and giggling, and also the sound of footsteps leaving the classrooms with varying pace.
Everyday, the same thing occurring over and over again.
Sighing heavily, I picked up my bag and walked over to the class door.
"Haru!!" Ah, yet again, that voice.
I turned around slowly.
"...here." She handed me her notebook.
I looked at it with not much of an interest.
"You're going to need it. For the exams."
"I thought you're not going to help me or anything."
She shrugged. "I'm still a friend."
I looked at her like I always do at almost every time the class ends like this.
"Just take it. I know you can do the notes yourself, but there's no harm in having an easier reference right?"
"...thanks." I took her book, and she looked kind of pleased.
"Make sure you give it back tomorrow."
"Mm."
She smiled a bit more, nodded, and turned away to continue her class duty.
The notebook she gave me.
The same notebook that she willingly lends to me a few minutes after the school bell rang.
The same notebook, with always the same letters at the center of the front page.
M. I. C. H. I. R. U.
+++ 01 : I'm Still Here (song by John Rzeznik)Nadia Nor at 23:05
Epilogue ~ 00 : Zero
everyday is a new day.
new chances, new possibilities, new faces.
even probably a new fate, a new destiny.
so they say.
but to me, everyday seems the same.
nothing new, nothing to look forward to.
and not even planning to change my fate or my destiny.
i live my monotonous life, desiring many things, did a lot of things, but nothing truly gets me to view this world differently.
i wish...
i wish someday, someone, something different will happen.
i wish deeply in my heart, in my soul.
+++ Epilogue ~ 00 : ZeroNadia Nor at 21:05
Sunday, April 22, 2007
Revamp...yep revamp.
hohoho...no more arts here. they've moved to
http://hardspirits.deviantart.com so please drop by there. thank you~
mm...this blog here will be here for the sake of...being here. whenever i feel like it i'll come by here now and then. not constantly tho, but yeah, i'll try to make this *barely-alive* page morea live.
bleh.
Nadia Nor at 12:53